The other night someone commented to Mike and me that “Aimee works so hard!” Implying that Mike needs to help me out more because my work is harder than his. He came back with a quick “I work hard too!” Then the subject was changed and nothing more was said. It got me thinking about our division of labor and who really does work harder.
I work ha
rd, from the time I get up until the time I go to sleep I am working. I am busy doing laundry, preparing meals and cleaning up meals for 7 people. I clean bathrooms and vacuum and wipe sticky stuff of floors. I kiss boo-boo’s, admire art and school work, cheer for small victories and wipe chubby bottoms. That is enough to make anyone tired! So yeah I work hard. There are also a lot of perks to my job. If I want to I can put off doing the laundry or ironing. I can fix tuna sandwiches or open a jar of spaghetti sauce for dinner. If I don’t vacuum the floors one day no one but me notices. I can take a nap during the afternoon, and I usually do. If I feel bored and restless I can take the kids to the park or to McDonalds and have a long lunch with friends. I am my own boss, and I only answer to myself.
Mike works hard. From the time he gets up until he goes to bed he is working. He has to be to work by 8, only gets an hour off for lunch, and can leave at 5 if his work is done. When he gets home he is helping with homework, bath time, kissing boo-boo’s and cheering those small victories. Once the kids are settled he may go play on the computer, or he might be working on various side jobs he has g
oing. He takes the garbage out, changes light bulbs, hangs pictures, rubs my feet, and helps feed my animals. He mows lawns, digs holes, and shovels walks. This is all along with the church service he does that takes most of his Sundays and a few hours during the week. He works hard! He has perks, the evenings are mostly his, mostly, and if he wants to watch TV or play on the computer he usually can. However, he can’t put off items at work, he will be fired, he can’t go in late without asking permission, or he will be fired, he can’t leave until 5 and sometimes later depending on his work. He can’t sneak in a nap, unless he uses his lunch hour. He can’t have long lingering lunches at the park with his girlfriends like I do (I hope he doesn’t have girlfriends like I do…HA!) He works so hard!
Now, whose work is more important? Neither, they are just as valuable, just as needed. We are a team. We work together to build our life. He works hard, I work hard and together we work hard for each other and our children.
I have decided that no one will ever again imply in my presence that Mike doesn’t work as hard as I do. It is simply not true. I value what he does and I am so thankful that I married a man who is so willing to work so hard for me.
This is the secret to success! It takes a long time to realize who does what in the ‘division of labor’ saga, but once that is figured out the most important thing to learn is that both jobs are valuable and important. We are lucky if we have someone to share life with…what if we had to do it alone! yikes! I count my blessing every day that I am a stay at home mom and am the BOSS!!
Amen! Men don’t get enough credit anymore. Something happened in the feminist movement that made too many women defensive and took the ability to give men their due away.
I have only been married 6 months, but there is nothing that replaces knowing a man and a woman are working together for the same thing. We both know we can’t do it alone. Genesis 2:18
“And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.”