Category Archives: thoughts on life

Sigh…..

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Usually on Friday’s I do a Mr. Fluffy post, but today I just don’t have the heart. I am still trying to lose the pounds I gained over Valentine’s Day; it is going to set me back a whole month. I get so frustrated with myself. Why do I do this! Why, for the momentary pleasure of a chocolate candy or a hamburger, do I sabotage my dreams and goals of being at a healthy, attractive weight? You would think I could stay focused, you would think all the down sides would keep me on track. They don’t. You would think sitting at a family party and looking over everyone and realizing that I am the biggest person there, besides my husband (we are a pudgy couple) would kick my butt into gear. It makes me so sad, and depressed and frustrated; all I want to do is go home and eat something sweet to sooth myself. You would think that the fact that nothing in my closet fits me would be a motivator; it only makes me want to reach for another Dove Chocolate. I am so frustrated, I want to get past this mental block, but I don’t know how. I know the formula to losing weight is to eat less and move more, but there just seems to be so much more to this. I spent my twenty’s having babies, nursing babies and gaining weight. I don’t want to spend my thirties waddling around after those babies.

Division of Labor

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The other night someone commented to Mike and me that “Aimee works so hard!” Implying that Mike needs to help me out more because my work is harder than his. He came back with a quick “I work hard too!” Then the subject was changed and nothing more was said. It got me thinking about our division of labor and who really does work harder.

I work hard, from the time I get up until the time I go to sleep I am working. I am busy doing laundry, preparing meals and cleaning up meals for 7 people. I clean bathrooms and vacuum and wipe sticky stuff of floors. I kiss boo-boo’s, admire art and school work, cheer for small victories and wipe chubby bottoms. That is enough to make anyone tired! So yeah I work hard. There are also a lot of perks to my job. If I want to I can put off doing the laundry or ironing. I can fix tuna sandwiches or open a jar of spaghetti sauce for dinner. If I don’t vacuum the floors one day no one but me notices. I can take a nap during the afternoon, and I usually do. If I feel bored and restless I can take the kids to the park or to McDonalds and have a long lunch with friends. I am my own boss, and I only answer to myself.

Mike works hard. From the time he gets up until he goes to bed he is working. He has to be to work by 8, only gets an hour off for lunch, and can leave at 5 if his work is done. When he gets home he is helping with homework, bath time, kissing boo-boo’s and cheering those small victories. Once the kids are settled he may go play on the computer, or he might be working on various side jobs he has going. He takes the garbage out, changes light bulbs, hangs pictures, rubs my feet, and helps feed my animals. He mows lawns, digs holes, and shovels walks. This is all along with the church service he does that takes most of his Sundays and a few hours during the week. He works hard! He has perks, the evenings are mostly his, mostly, and if he wants to watch TV or play on the computer he usually can. However, he can’t put off items at work, he will be fired, he can’t go in late without asking permission, or he will be fired, he can’t leave until 5 and sometimes later depending on his work. He can’t sneak in a nap, unless he uses his lunch hour. He can’t have long lingering lunches at the park with his girlfriends like I do (I hope he doesn’t have girlfriends like I do…HA!) He works so hard!

Now, whose work is more important? Neither, they are just as valuable, just as needed. We are a team. We work together to build our life. He works hard, I work hard and together we work hard for each other and our children.

I have decided that no one will ever again imply in my presence that Mike doesn’t work as hard as I do. It is simply not true. I value what he does and I am so thankful that I married a man who is so willing to work so hard for me.

Beauty

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I was puttering around the house this afternoon and something caught my eye out the back window. So I grabbed the camera, and went out the back door.

My back yard is pretty much open land. There is about a million acres of nothing behind us. It can be a nuisance; there are snake, bugs, weeds, wild fires and mice. There is also a lot of beauty. Flowers in the spring time, the smell of wet sage (reminds me of the ranch) after a summer storm, sunflowers in the summer and beautiful shades of yellow in the fall. In the winter we have snow up there (or dead grass depending on the year) with beautiful snow drifts and deer tracks. The one thing we have year round is breath taking sunsets, and lovely skies.

This is what I see out my back door

This is what I saw when I walked out on the back step.

There is no need for words.

This world is so beautiful.

Then I looked down at my poor dead, empty flower beds and saw all the little bird tracks. Kind of cute huh.

(Hopefully in two months time that flower bed will be full of daffodils, I planted 100 bulbs in that bed this fall)

and on the other side, next to my cold dead roses, more tracks.

There are moments in our hum-drum days, when God says “stop, look, be filled.” If we stop, look, our weary, tired souls will be filled.

Are we allowing God to fill it?

Food Storage and Cooking

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I have been thinking a lot lately about food, food storage, and getting back to simple living. I think these days we are way too hurried. I long for simpler times and simpler things. I dream about the days when it was not just good, but admired and praised when a woman took care of her family. When there was pride in a home well kept, food well prepared and children well brought up.
Sometimes it takes a while for me to wrap my brain around things. We have been commanded to get out of debt, store food, and prepare for times of disaster (whether they are personal disasters or major regional disasters). For all of my 10 years of marriage we have done none of those things. We have talked about them, said we needed to do them, but never have. I for one become very overwhelmed at the idea of storing a years worth of food for 7 people. That is a lot of food. Also, I would wonder what in the world am I going to do with 100 pounds of wheat? 200 pounds of beans? I didn’t even think my family would eat beans…! So I would buy little extras here and there, but nothing substantial. 30 boxes of Macaroni and Cheese are good, but not very healthy if that is all you have to eat.

Then our Stake President broke it up a little bit more for me. He set a goal for the stake. He wanted us all to have 2 weeks of living expenses saved and three months of food. I can do that. I thought to myself “how easy would it be to store three months worth of breakfast?” I started to look around. I started to ask friends questions. A good friend of my directed me to a web site that is all about simple living and cooking. There are a ton of recipes that are simple and the ingredients can be stored easily. I stared to buy extra oatmeal. I stared to make homemade granola, it is cheaper than commercial cereal and there are no preservatives, or dyes or chemical additives and I can modify the recipe to what my family likes. I looked into buying pancake mixes and soon discovered that not only do they no keep very long, it is also much cheaper to just make it from scratch, and it really only takes about 5 minutes longer than adding water to a mix. In no time and very little money later I have my three months supply, and even better, I was using it, and rotating it! My kids liked the homemade pancakes and I learned how to modify the recipes to make them lower in fat, higher in fiber and to suit the tastes of my family.

The whole getting up and cooking my children a hot breakfast instead of them fending for themselves with cold sugary cereal gave rise to a new family routine that I have come to love. My husband was going through a really bad spot in life. He was an angry man, unhappy with his work; people that he thought were good friends were turning out to be terrible people who only used him. There was very little I could do to help him. He worked long, long hours and most weekends with very little time off. I tired to be supportive, but it was wearing on me and the kids. Our home was not a happy place. I was talking to a neighbor about all this, she had had a similar experience with her husband and I needed some insight. She mentioned that she got up every morning with her husband and they ate breakfast together, and that it had seemed to help a little. So I decided that I was going to do that. We were going to have breakfast together as a family. Now, I am not a morning person, this was going to be a huge sacrifice. However I was committed. So we did just that, I wake up when he does and while he is showering, I get the kids up and the school girls dressed, make breakfast and pack him a lunch (something I never have really ever done). He reads scriptures out loud for a minute and we all start the day, together, as a family. Now I don’t know if that really changed anything for him, there were some other things we did, and some changes that were made that I will talk about another time, but it sure brought our family closer. I really think that by me obeying, and learning to cook better for my family brought more blessings to us than just having the food for a time of need. If I hadn’t already been thinking along those lines and already working towards feeding my family a good breakfast would I have been open to the idea of getting up an hour earlier to prepare breakfast? I honestly don’t think I would have.

Anyway, I am going to start bloging about my journey into food storage, using it, and getting back to basic whole foods. All the while trying to do it frugally. I hope you don’t mind trying and testing recipes with me and if it really bores you, just ignore my ramblings on the subject!!!!